Monday, February 22, 2010

Well I am back and I gotta say...I LOVE gay guys.

I was going to stay until Tuesday Morning, but I heard on the Radio of a storm so I did the responsible thing and came home today. How boring of me eh?

I pulled up to the Cabin around 5:30 am Sunday Morning into the driveway and the lights of my vehicle where shining on the frozen Lake. Lo and Behold a small pack of Wolves is moving silently across it about 50 yards from the Cabin.

I sucked in my breath and held it. I watched for a few, then scrambled to grab my camera and "shit" I was so hurried to grab the dogs and get out, I left it on the diningroom table.

I wake up the pups, out we go. As I am opening the door I notice a large package sitting on the table of the entrance way. Wrapped up in a big red bow.

Tag Reads.


We Just Simply Love You.


I open it and its a full box of 50 Orchids and the perfume just fills the air.


Tears.


Why can't straight guys be this thoughtful? Is it that hard for guys to get in touch with their sensitive side?


Anyway, I sent him back a Bottle of Wine and a Big Thank You Card, including a lipstick kiss and I don't even wear lipstick. He should get it tonight and I know he will laugh his ass off at the thought of me even attempting to put on lipstick.


Now what to do with this brand new, once used and never to be used again tube of lipstick?

I did a lot of thinking and writing while I was there. Something I tend to do when I get away. So be prepared for an earful of blah blah's. If you are so inclined to read them at is. I hope you do as a lot of thought and passion has gone into them.


Diana, (a bit more relaxed, need more time out there)

Friday, February 19, 2010

I am going away

I am going away for my days off this week. I need to get out.

A good friend has given me the keys to his Log Cabin and I am outta here.

If the snow gets bad, I might not make it back.

Can you call that a culpable absense?

Just how does one control Mother Nature?

Be sure to let you know, if I figure that one out!

Dogs in tow, wish I had a new man to bring along.

It's a beautiful Cabin, with a two storey stone fireplace, round couch, a King Sized Four Poster Bed and one hell of a Jacuzzi!

Now all I need is the Masseuse.

Now me is, Happy Me :D

Diana

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Message Received

Loud and Clear.


WOW!


Stoic, Indifference, now that's a new one for me.


The word asshole doesn't even begin to describe him.


Sure would be nice to know what I said or did to deserve such, but I don't expect I will get an explanation.


Leave'em hanging is a Man's motto for the most part. I have learned to live with it.


Won't hurt for long, but it still hurts.


Diana (at a loss????)

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Slipping through my fingers....

I can feel it.

I am in a bit of a panic and a bit depressed tonight.

One more night and it might be gone. A chance. A hope. Anything left?

Do I panic or try and maintain. Flight or Fight? That is the question.

Being born in year of the Tiger, you would think I would fight. Alas I am a chicken at heart, but don't let anyone know that. I put up a good front on some days and other days I crumble.

I think this where I crumble.

I know I won't sleep tonight. My mind will be racing. I know tomorrow will bring a lack of appetite, stress beyond belief, panic, agitation, pacing, and a headache the scope of which cannot be explained. (note to self: remember Advil)

I need to let it go and in time this too shall pass.

I know that, but right now, I feel like I am in turmoil and right now is what counts.

Diana,
(trying to stop the silly assed voice in my head.)

Monday, February 8, 2010

I am a Private Citizen

working for a Public Company. Therefore if you take a picture of me and I ask you to stop, you must and if you have the picture published I can then sue you under Civil Law.

That is the Law.


There may be no Privacy Act in Ontario, but that does NOT mean you can publish my picture without my consent and not expect to get hauled into Court.

I know my CIVIL rights. I have studied Law.

Nuff said.

Off to bed

Wolves, Me, Karma and Mother Nature.

Watched the show Valley of the Wolves last night on Animal Planet and God I want to be there.

This show even depicts that Karma exists in Nature. A group of Wolves takes over a territory from a smaller weaker pack. The new group strives to maintain the new territory and the old one as well. Nature doesn’t like greed either and Karma bit them back. Their pups all got sick and died. Then another unknown pack came and killed a strong second in command greedy male and drove off one other male. Then this unknown pack held the den site of the greedy's new pups at siege for 12 days and all the new pups’ died in the den. Then the unknown pack just disappeared. As if Mother Nature herself has a gang of enforcers that deliver her strong messages. The greedy pack that originally took over from the weaker pack, then just slip away to their old territory and die off.

Eventually the original weaker pack has pups, raises them to adulthood then slowly make their way back to the valley they got driven out of. Expecting a challenge and a need to fight for their original territory, only to be met with silence.

What an example of Karma! Beautifully played out in the wilds of Mother Nature.


I want to spend my days in the company of unconditional love and respect. I want to be in the wild with them. To feel their warmth and feel their spirits surround me. They are such beautiful creatures.

Mythical, magical, eerie and scary. Why I am so drawn to them is beyond me. I just feel the need to be with them. I am really starting to yearn for my life to change. I am really starting to want to just get out.


To be one with Nature. To go back to my roots, feed my soul and regain my Spirit.

Funny I called that Bear guy a freak for wanting to be with the Bears and eventually being killed by them and here I am wanting to be with a pack of Wolves!

I think that just shows how fed up I am with the Human Condition and all this Hate that is around me.

It just sucks the life out of you.

Or

Maybe I am just going bonkers!


Well one day if I disappear, you will know where to look for me, but I am not sure I will want to be found.


Diana, seeking Peace.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Static....ouch....grrr....ack...snap

I am having a huge issue with static right now. I just finished my laundry and I was attemtpting to take my clothes out of the laundry basket and I was literally being shocked. I mean there are freakin SPARKS!!!! coming off my clothes.

I fear my clothes are going to start a fire, seriously there are sparks!

Is anyone else having this issue right now?

I am not only using Downey in the Rinse cycle but using two dryer sheets!

How do I stop this? Is is really annoying and scares the crap outta of me.

Ah, little issues, so petty, but I hate it.................

Do you think it might be the fact the laundry basket is plastic?

Hmmm, maybe this is it and I need a new basket.

Lifes little ponderings huh.

Diana no more today, I am done.

UH-OH...there is going to be a poop storm

Well I just read a letter that came from the General Manager or the TTC and it will surely incite some discontent with many of the TTC Drivers.

I suspect this is not going to be a good thing once again.

I saw another video of a driver going to get a coffee and pee but here is the thing. The kid that shot that video did not have a proper fare or paid a student fare but did not have a Student Id. The driver let him on anyway and the kid then proceeded to shoot the video anyway.

Wow, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

So I guess this kid has made it so that every student out there better have the proper fare and a student id card or no ride.

Nice way to do the driver kid, and nice way to do all your fellow students.

I have to say that I too have never enforced that and let the kids ride without showing their id card but paying only a student fare.

Now ask me why, I should do that now?

Like I said I am not a get you back type person, but this really gets my goat.

I also did a search on videos showing poor rider behavior. There are many and it's sad that these are not news worthy.

Well, things are going to come to a head soon and I am just waiting to see what happens.

I know I will continue to do my job and do it to the best of my abilities. Some people however are never happy no matter how they are treated.

Oh and will be taking bathroom breaks whether you like it it not. I will not put my health at risk for you, I will not piss my pants for you, I will not be subjected to any indignities for you.

Also if I am at the end of my line early, I will get a coffee or water or whatever I want.

I AM entitled to that, again whether you like it or not. It has nothing to do with the fact I am Union and everything to do with my RIGHTS as an employee of any company.

Sorry if you don't like that or have a problem with it but that's life. There are many many things we don't like but have to live with.

Enough on this subject.

I am done.

I have stated my case.

I think this whole thing is a bucket of shit and soon to be flung right back atcha.

Diana, off to do laundry.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

On a lighter note

MANTRACKER IS HAWT!


LOL. can ya tell I just watched the show.


Oooooo baby. I like that man....


It's Saturday and I am in a good mood.

Smiles.

Bye......

Well how about that...Harrassment TTC

Just found this when doing a search

One on One

Looks like we can claim harrassment.

Huh, who knew.

I will bold this part as it is my favorite part.

"A detective with the Toronto Police who asked not to be named said that it is not illegal to record a bus driver making mistakes unless it becomes criminal harassment. Criminal harassment is when a person is following a driver day in and day out or obstructing the safe operation of the driver's route. In turn a bus driver can not legally stop a passenger from taking his or her picture as long as the driver's job is not being affected.
"A driver can stop his bus if they believe that the person taking pictures or video is impeding the safe operation of the vehicle. The best course of action is to take complaints to the TTC complaint office."
The detective also said that this month's "blood sport is the TTC."



Wow, never knew this and I kinda like the fact that the TTC will not address these one on one issues.

Just because someone has a problem with one driver does not mean we are all bad and should be punished because of the actions of one driver.

Not saying that the drivers in question are wrong either as I have no idea if they were doing anything wrong.

BUT my sense tells me they (the ones being videoed lately) haven't done a dam thing wrong.

They are entitled to a break and if you don't like it, get off the bus and wait for another.

I also found out my Assistant Super at my Division supports us drivers who do need a break and that is all I NEED to hear.

More later, maybe.....

I also can't believe that certain news media CITYTV find that this is news. They have created the feeding frenzy and if anything happens as a result of this I have told many drivers to hold them responsible.

The media also needs to take responsibility and accountability for anyone that gets hurt as a result of all this.

The media had a responsiblity to ask the TTC if these breaks are common and allowed before splashing this shit all over the place.

If is was and is IS allowed then the media CITYTV to be exact has seriously over stepped the bounderies of what is news and what is just TRASH TALK.

SHAME ON YOU CITYTV. I will no longer watch your pitiful channel. You have become the TabROID of television.

My name is Diana and I do NOT support local television anymore. Screw You.

Oh and even GOOGLE has to blur peoples faces now, so ya better watch out. You ARE invading peoples privacy and someone may get hurt as a result. Then if it can be shown that the media released a picture of a person and that person was assaulted by a ooo lets say STALKER...........see ya in Court dudes and that court date will include the jerk off camera idiot.

The story behind the F'en Bitch comment

So I bet some are wondering why would anyone call sweet ole me an F'en Bitch.

Let me tell you why.

I pull up to a stop and there is about 5 people standing there. I am not late, I am not early I am right on time for that stop.

(Yes we do have what is called Timing Points and it tells us when we are supposed to be at each stop on our Route, but PLEASE we are RARELY able to meet that schedule as it is VERY tight. If there is a problem, we cannot be there at that time. And by problem I mean even ONE accident can kill that stupid schedule. So its an unrealistic expection of YOU and our Boss to hold us to.)


Everyone, except this one male pig, shows me their pass or transfer. As male pig is moving past me, I say.

"Excuse me Sir, do you have a Pass or Transfer?"

How polite of me huh?

He then turns and says...

"Fuck you you Fucken Bitch" and starts to attempt to tell me why he won't pay but I raise my voice cut off his FOUL so called speach by saying.

"OFF THE BUS! BUT THANK YOU FOR ATTEMPTING TO RIDE THE TTC"

Well the whole Bus burst out laughing and a women sitting in the first row behind me was drinking a pop and laughed so hard it came out her nose.

The male pig, lowered its head and stepped off the Bus.

You know what, it is RUDE to not pay. I know that many are pissed at us, but we are still providing a service. There are good drivers, not so good drivers and there are really bad drivers.

I AM A GOOD DRIVER. I AM POLITE AND TO THE POINT. IF YOU ASK ME A QUESTION I WILL ANSWER YOU. IF I DON'T KNOW I WILL DIRECT YOU TO THE PERSON OR PLACE WHERE YOU WILL FIND THE ANSWER.

I DESERVE TO BE PAID FOR MY SERVICE AND MY TIME. I AM NOT THE BAD GUY AND IF YOU DON'T PUT A FARE IN MY FAREBOX YOU ARE INSULTING ME AND BASICALLY SAYING I AM THE BAD GUY.

You want FAIRNESS then give it back people. Be fair to me and the OTHER good drivers by NOT lumping us into the same HEAP as the assholes amoung us.


So, to you male pig, I take back my calling you Sir. You are NOT a Sir and will never deserve the title of such.

You want good service then pay for it. There is over 80 million dollars in Fare Disputes. People don't pay . They buy Fraudulant Passes, try to pass off old transfers or simply walk right by us.

Well you say, is it not your job to enforce people to pay. NO actually it's not. It is NOT my job to get my head kicked in or to be spat upon. It is NOT my job to be insulted or verbally abused by these low lifes.

Would you ask? Knowing that the number ONE reason we are assaulted is because of fare disputes?

Do YOU put up with this kind of treatment from YOUR customers? Or do you have the Luxury of walking away and getting your Boss to handle them?

Yeah that's right you have that Luxury. So maybe the TTC should hire all Bouncer Types that can handle these low lifes.....Yea well then.. ya wanna see bad customer service....just put a bunch of steriod junkies behind the wheel.....that'll teach'em.

Whatever...

Rant done.

Off to do some shopping and walk the pups.

Later peeps.

Diana

Friday, February 5, 2010

So Tonight He...............

walked right by me and said Hello to someone, but not to me.

So I guess my assumptions that he liked me were unfounded. It was just my imagination once again.

Huh.

I wash my hands of this and move on.........I just have too much on my mind and this is really taking up a lot of energy. I think about him too much and it gets all fuzzy after awhile.

Happy Friday Everyone.

Not much to say. Too tired.

Off to watch a movie.

Diana

On a happier note I forgot to mention that tonight, I was called an F'en Bitch by one guy and another told me that being 35 years old and trying to act like I was 25 was not attractive.....

LOL LOL LOL LOL

Jerk, I am almost 50!!!

So thanks for the compliment :)

I could have kissed him, but ya know.....blech

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Thinking about all this..

I have been thinking about all this bad publicity with the TTC lately and my state of mind. I have been jumpy lately and not sleeping. Also I can't seem to bring myself to get on the torch, or draw or paint or even clean my house.

I love to drive. I absolutely love it. I once drove from Toronto to Nova Scotia without stopping to sleep. I did stop for coffee and pee breaks, but my love of driving kept me going. I know I know, that is not good and I might have been a danger on the road, but I don't think so. I just love to drive.

But this trash talk about us drivers has made it very difficult for me to love to drive a Bus. I did at first and on good days I still do. I feel at ease behind the wheel. I feel good behind the wheel. It is my place to just zone out life and be the best driver I can be. I am good ya know....

I like to think I am good with the people too. I have had my share of issues, but who hasn't. I am sure passengers have had issues with other passengers. But that passenger will only have to one issue that day and might not have another for weeks or months to come. I have to deal with nasty, ugly people everyday, sometimes many hundreds of times a day, then deal with that same person the next day and the next day.......

Do I love my Job? Yes on the good days. On the bad ones, I want to just stop the bus, get out and walk all the way home and not go back. But I don't. I keep driving and keep tolerating and keep saying thank you and I keep trying to be nice...It is getting really hard though.

I have gotten threats, people holding up their phones as if taking my picture for just going to the bathroom, or when I am at my ends early, going to get a bottle of water or coffee. I have become an innocent target of peoples rage and hate.

Not something I thought about when taking this job. Not something I signed up for.
Did I know or was I made aware of the issues with problem people? Yes, but I had no idea it was this bad. There was some sugar coating, and I am a sugar lover, so I think I absorbed that part and filed the rest. I thought to myself, how can people be nasty or ugly to me, if I am nice to them. God I am so Nieve. Must change that. Something to work on within my personality.

So with that, I think I will be giving up my senority and moving into something else within the TTC. Once my two years of blood and guts has been given I can apply for a job elsewhere and never have to drive a Bus again.

THAT saddens me. Just thinking about it almost makes me cry. People have successfully taken my Joy and made it my Misery........

I guess because I worked with dogs for the past 7 years I have been so out of the loop on this whole, how to treat others, I did not realize it had gotten this bad. I did not realize people had so much hate in the hearts and minds.

People can be so awful to other people.

When there is a ban wagon people seem to jump right on without asking themselves why or even if that band wagon is morally right. They will question it later and maybe feel bad about it later, but by then the damage is done.

You can't take that back.

And now I might face suspension if I take a pee break or go get a coffee.

See here

Wow, things are going to come to a head soon. I see no good coming from this.

Anger goes both ways or did you not realize that?

Also I am so sick of people with University Degrees telling us we make too much money and that we are all a bunch of uneducated morons, who should not make more than them.

What exactly qualifies a salary? The fact that you have a Degree is the ONLY basis that YOU should make more than Me?
That Degree or piece of paper makes YOU a better employee than me?
That Degree makes you more valuable than me?
That Degree makes you less likely to go to the washroom than me?
That Degree means you will NEVER use company time to do something personal?
That Degree means you will never make a personal phone call on company time, or use the computer for personal time?
That Degree means you will never take a break even though you are entitled to it not only because your company gives you breaks but the Employment Act gives you the RIGHT to take a break?
That Degree makes you smarter than me?
That Degree gave you the ability to handle people and stressful situations better than me?

Again I am going to refer you to the post below and this may explain why we make more than you. Do YOU suffer 4 times the stress level of Police Officers? Do you face an angry crowd everyday? Do you FEAR going to work and having your picture posted on the front page with the words SLACKER splashed across it, simply for going to the bathroom?

And by the by, many of the TTC workers of today have University Degrees but could not find a JOB in their chosen field or where laid off, then they became Drivers.

So that arguement is BULLSHIT and I called it.

Have a good one.


Diana

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

TTC drivers in crisis....Pulled from TorontoStar

Subway driver Bryan Tollefson, at his Angus home, suffered from post-traumatic stress after seeing two suicides and an accidental death. Depression returned when a drunk assaulted him.

Litany of abuse, lives of fear

The Star obtained scores of occupational injury and disease reports filed in the last several months by drivers from two TTC divisions. They provide a grim snapshot of life behind the wheel.

One driver, who got a gob of spit in the face Nov. 23, 2007, worried about a communicable disease. A few days before that, a driver reported that an "unidentified male showed me a gun as he was leaving the bus." This driver said she later had trouble sleeping. Eighteen-year veteran Chris, of the TTC's Queensway division, said he'd rather take a punch than suffer again what happened last August. Chris says he was verbally sparring with a rider who had insulted a blind passenger.

"Just as I turned away, he grabs me, pulls toward me, horks a loogie on me like you wouldn't believe," Chris said. "I didn't tell my kids. It's degrading. I would have rather taken a punch."

Chris said he missed six weeks of work due to anxiety and fear he had contracted an "infectious disease."

"I just put the blinders on. I just look forward. I don't look at what goes in the fare box any more," he said. "If I didn't lose my seniority, I would go somewhere else in the commission."The documents also show drivers reported: Suffering a broken thumb and inhalation of pepper spray during a fight on a bus; broken eyeglasses after a punch to the head; and seeing a red laser-light flash, stoking fears of a sniper. Several drivers said riders gestured as if pulling guns out of coat pockets and waistbands, or pulling a blade across a throat.

David Bruser and Tess Kalinowski




David Bruser

Tess Kalinowski
Staff Reporters
Nearly 200 TTC bus, streetcar and subway operators are suffering from severe stress usually associated with survivors of combat, natural disasters and rape.

Their rate of post-traumatic stress disorder is about four times that of police officers who patrol Toronto streets, and the city's transit drivers report these problems more than any other workers in Ontario, according to provincial data.

Drivers have suffered a wide range of abuse – shot at with an air rifle, punched in the eye, head-butted in the mouth, gashed with a broken beer bottle, to list just a few examples the Star uncovered.

Shawn Gilchrist, psychologically crippled by the disorder, missed nearly two years of work after four riders swarmed and dragged him to the bus floor, then kicked, punched and dislodged a molar.

A driver got a gob of spit in the face and mouth, and spent weeks off work and ran through many tubes of toothpaste trying to erase the memory.

Another driver, Michael, said he was driving along Kipling Ave. in 2005 when the headlights of an oncoming Jetta went out. The sedan crept closer, its passenger window going down. Seconds later, the window next to Michael's head had a hole in it and a spider web of cracks.

"I saw this thing coming out of the sedan's window, and I'm still looking at it. All of sudden ... Pop. Pop. Pop. Pop. I screamed at everyone: `Get down. We're taking fire.' I didn't know what to say," said Michael, his voice quickening and pitched with anger. "I thought: I'm not going to see my family again. This is it."He later learned he was shot at with an air rifle and was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

"I couldn't sleep. I kept being paranoid. I didn't want to drive."

The Star obtained the records from the Workplace Safety & Insurance Board after a freedom of information battle lasting nearly two years. Names of drivers were withheld. Through interviews the Star found some claimants and agreed not to identify those with strong concern for their safety.

In a five-year period ending in 2005, at least 181 drivers claimed post-traumatic stress disorder, missing an average of 49 days of work, with some absent only days and others more than a year. The traumatized drivers missed a total of nearly 9,000 workdays. An additional 102 operators reported missing weeks or months of work because they were suffering anxiety, neurotic disorders and depression.

The men and women on the front lines of the TTC, for the most part, take the job because they like sitting behind the wheel, chatting with the public and earning a steady paycheque.

But some drivers say they have become easy targets for surly riders. They are demoralized, tentative around strangers and fearful.

Subway operator Bryan Tollefson, who suffered from the disorder 10 years ago after seeing two suicides and an accidental death in the subway, says he has sunk back into depression after a drunk head-butted him in the mouth in 2006.

With overcrowding on buses and streetcars, fare hikes and traffic snarling transit schedules, the operators say they are facing an increasingly frustrated, unpredictable public. The number of reported crimes on TTC property spiked dramatically in 2006, from 2,744 the year before to 3,415, a 24 per cent increase. Meanwhile, the drivers struggle for sympathy from their own employer, an outfit of nearly 11,000 employees heavily focused on timely service and, drivers say, not enough on their safety.

TTC management, though, is making a big push to make life on the road and rails less stressful."I think we have an obligation to do something," said TTC chair Adam Giambrone. "This is unacceptable. We have to take this seriously. This is about respect and safety of our operators. They didn't sign up to be soldiers."

Post-traumatic stress disorder, often caused by witnessing or experiencing a traumatic event involving the threat of injury or death, is the second-leading cause of loss-time at the TTC. Transit commission workers suffering sprains, strains and tears missed a total of 27,000 days of work between 2000 and 2005, the most recent years available to the Star.

Symptoms of the disorder include frequent, involuntary reliving of the event and irritability, and could include increased blood pressure and feelings of helplessness. Sufferers could also develop unhealthy coping devices, such as feelings of detachment and numbness.

"You live an increasingly narrow life and, on top of that, (you) are in a kind of a hyper-arousal state, ready to fight or flight," said Dr. Alain Brunet, psychiatry professor at McGill University. "(Sufferers) don't sleep well, they have problems concentrating, easily distracted, easily startled, and they may have a short fuse."

Described, often dismissively, as shell shock in World War I, and neurosis in World War II, and captured in Vietnam War-era photos as the "thousand-yard stare," post-traumatic stress disorder is now recognized not as a moral weakness but as a legitimate, sometimes devastating disorder.

"I came to the realization I was shut off all the time, even when I came home," said subway operator Tollefson, who says he missed five months of work in the late '90s due to the disorder. "It bothers me that I don't feel anything. Oftentimes I don't feel anger or joy or pleasure. You just go about your business. You do what is right by your family, but there's no feeling behind it."

Several psychiatrists and experts say bus drivers are more prone to the disorder than those in many other jobs.

"They're easy targets. They wear a uniform. They represent a form of authority but without too much power," said Brunet, who found a "higher than expected" rate of the disorder among Montreal bus drivers in a study conducted 12 years ago.Norman Shields, a psychologist who treats combat veterans, says bus drivers might be more likely to suffer from the disorder than soldiers because of the driver's relative inability to act – to use handcuffs, a weapon, anything to react to the adrenaline rush that comes with an assault.

"We're sitting ducks out here," said Dino, a bus driver for 10 years. "You don't know when it's coming."

Dino, 43, who says he's been punched, threatened with death, spit on and had to dodge rocks thrown through his windshield, doesn't want his last name published for fear his assailants will track him down. Dino missed a month of work in 2000 after a domestic dispute spilled onto his bus and a man waved a gun in his face, muttering, "I'm going to blow your head off."

While TTC officials say 99 per cent of the riding public are kind and thankful, it is clear drivers have become whipping posts for frustrated Torontonians.

"Imagine if I was in a supermarket, and I didn't like the price of milk that day and I punched the clerk," said Bob Kinnear, head of Amalgamated Transit Union Local 113, which represents the 4,500 TTC operators. "I don't know of many jobs where you have people missing time because they got punched in the face at work."

Giambrone says the rise is due in part to increasing pressures on the system.

"We carry more people. We have more customer service complaints," Giambrone says. "Are people more upset when the quality of service is not what it was in the past? Absolutely. Is it acceptable to take it out on the driver? No."

A dedicated and decorated employee, Shawn Gilchrist, 47, needed only four years on the job to become the driver he is today: Nervous in public and joyless on the job.

His breaking point: Around 8 p.m., May 7, 2005. He asked a man who underpaid to pay a full fare. The rider taunted Gilchrist until the bus pulled into the Lawrence West subway station. "Four guys kicked the s--- out of me. I was panicking for my life," said Gilchrist, who, before joining the TTC, made headlines when he tackled a gun-wielding, would-be bank robber at a midtown CIBC branch.

"I had trouble sleeping. I wasn't eating. I was afraid to leave my apartment. I was crying for no reason. I don't think I'm a wimp."

His colleague and friend Fred Hickey, 38, missed 11 months due to post-traumatic stress disorder after a rider pierced his lip with a broken beer bottle May 29, 2004.

TTC officials say they cannot pinpoint the cost of the problem, though all claims accepted by the Workplace Safety & Insurance Board, including those involving physical injuries, drain nearly $10 million from the commission every year.

Add to this the cost of lost fares as drivers increasingly fear challenging riders who don't pay. Several drivers interviewed by the Star said it's a simple if depressing choice: Ignore the fraud, or challenge the freeloader and risk a punch.

"I fear fare disputes because I just want to get home in one piece," says driver Anne Marie Dennis, 40. "You do it to the wrong person and he pulls a knife."

Dennis, a light bruise fading from around her left eye, talked to the Star two days after being hit in the face by a rider she asked to leave the bus for swearing at passengers. On the report Dennis is required to fill out after such an incident, the doctor at the walk-in clinic near her home wrote: "Stressed out, fear of going back to work."

And the cost mounts. Due to an increase in driver assaults, the TTC plans to install plastic shields on buses and streetcars. One prototype, including installation, would cost $1,500 per bus. The shields could appear as soon as this year.

As part of a $34 million project, the TTC is currently installing cameras on buses and streetcars and in subway stations to help deter would-be offenders.

Also, with the help of a $446,000 research grant from the Workplace Safety & Insurance Board, the TTC, along with two Toronto hospitals, this month began a study of drivers who have suffered stress-related injuries. The TTC's chief safety officer says the study should help the commission understand how to best treat sufferers of post-traumatic stress disorder.

In December, the TTC announced it will spend more than $7 million to hire a U.S. firm expected to reduce workplace injuries by reviewing and possibly enhancing safety polices. The contract could run as high as $9 million. The firm is the same one NASA hired after its last shuttle disaster killed seven.

Bus driver Fernando Da Silva recalled a recent fare dispute that erupted into violence when a rider punched him in the face. "All they cared about was the paperwork. All they care about: Are you coming to work tomorrow? Are you going to file WSIB?" he said. "All I wanted was ice on my eye."

TTC chair Giambrone says what Da Silva described "often leads to taking a bad situation and making it worse. Bad culture in the workplace leads to bad attitudes."

Giambrone and general manager Gary Webster said the agency is trying to do a better job of serving drivers' mental and emotional needs."I think as a company we've been a bit too hard-nosed, punitive," said Webster, sitting in his office at TTC headquarters, a book on workplace safety on his coffee table. "These (drivers) are very concerned about their safety. A lot of them are saying: `Show me the action.'"

But for driver Gary Dennis, Anne Marie's husband, the plastic shields threaten to drive an even deeper wedge between rider and driver.

"I'd probably quit the job if shields were put on," he said. "I'm claustrophobic. I like to deal with people."

Instead, Dennis would like to see more special constables to bolster the TTC's current force of 95 that is charged with patrolling the system's nearly 2,000 buses, streetcars and subway trains.

A TTC official says the commission is considering doubling the constable ranks by 2011.

"I think a lot of our surface operators don't feel like they have support out there," Giambrone said.

Data analysis by the Star's Andrew Bailey

David Bruser can be reached at 416-869-4282 or dbruser@thestar.ca

____________________________________________________________________________


I pulled this from the Toronto Star as I do not want to loose it when the site archives it.
I think this is important for people to read and remember.

Sorry it is a long read.

Here is the link as well.

The more bad publicity the more I fear going to work.

Love you too Toronto. Glad the media has made you guys do their dirty work and is trying to pit the public against us and us against you.

Not that we don't already have enough assaults and problems with riders and drivers.

So thanks guys! I wonder how many of you fear going to work the day after more bad publicity?

Diana....not liking the public much of late and getting more and more jaded everyday.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

A BIG THANK YOU TO

I would like to add a big thank you to the two ladies who comforted me yesterday when an incident happened on my Bus.

A man had kicked the bus just as I was pulling away and into an intersection and the sound was so loud, I thought I had hit someone or something. I jumped outta my skin.

Once through the intersection I realized I was shaking so bad from the jolt of fear and adrenaline that I felt it best not to continue the down trip. It was not safe for me to drive.

While they comforted me, there was a man yelling at me, telling me that if I am the nervous type then I should find another fucking job and that he was going to call in a complaint against me.

Those where his exact words. Thanks asshole for your support. I will remember to smile at you when I see you again......from the rear that is.....

Ladies you have restored my faith that people will come around and see that people do make a positive impact on us.

Diana

Recent Bad TTC Publicity...My Take.

Okay in light off all the bad publicity the TTC is getting right now I thought I would give you my take on some of the things I am hearing and reading.

I am relatively new to the TTC. I am only going into my first year. So with that and my training and my Customer Service background, I thought this was going to be a piece of cake. How wrong was I.

Now normally I am a patient, forgiving, water off a ducks back type of person. If you snark at me and I don't know you from Adam, it doesn't affect me, but if I do know you whether it's a friend, family or co-worker, it will affect me and sometimes deeply.

Now when I first began driving and picking up passengers, I said "Thank You" to each and every passenger that boarded, every day, five days a week for my 8 to 9 hours of driving.
Now imagine the number of people that is.....can you? Perhaps on a busy night it ranges into the high thousands, on a not so busy night or day, it might hit the low thousands. Depending as well on the Route. Some are more busy than others.

So then one day I was reading the local TabROID paper and someone commented that TTC Drivers never thank the riders. WRONG! This person obviously has never been on my Bus. I was a bit annoyed by that comment.

Their reasoning for a TTC Driver to thank them was that they are paying for a service and when paying for something, like in a store or restuarant, then the person servicing them should always say "Thank You"

True, yes true. But here is my arguement. Those people in the store or restuarant are not saying "thank you" to thousands upon thousands of people a day. They are not being met with angry glares, furrowed brows, sucking teeth, people looking at their watches and blaming the driver for being late when there was an accident or some other hold up beyond the drivers control. Getting sighs of discontent at being stuffed in like sardines, again not the drivers issue. Being told off because people are steppping on them, or not exiting by the rear doors. When giving the please move back annoucement, being told off by those in the back.

Now, I say how long could YOU still keep up the "Thank You's"? Well, with all that I still do BUT this past month I ran my own little experiement.

For one week I said thank you to every passenger that got on. I counted via my little writing pad, how many actually thanked me back or said have a nice day/night or where even pleasant with their looks.

Total of that whole week.

105 people actually thanked me back or said something nice back.

105 out of a possible 10's of thousands!!!!

So this week I decided not to say anything and just NOD. Well the numbers did go down to a sickening 8 people who said have a nice day/night.

So why should we thank you? Is my question to you.... Yes, You bought a pass or paid a fare, but its a service YOU want and you DEMAND the City provide and WE the drivers are just doing our job that YOU the public DEMAND. That job is driving you from point A to point B and getting you there SAFELY.

According to the number of accidents, we are doing just that. We are getting you to your destination SAFELY.

THAT in itself, is something we should be thanked for!

Now I know that sometimes things go wrong and Busses are late or Subways are down but again that is NOT the drivers fault or error. Why are you taking that out on us?

Yes, I know that when I pull up and I have a SHORT TURN sign it annoys you, or if I get short turned once you are on, that can be so frustrating, but again that is NOT MY FAULT or the fault of ANY Driver.

So with that and even after being assaulted once, my bus being shot at once, people kicking my bus making me jump outta my skin thinking I hit someone, people telling me I am an uneducated idiot and reading all the negativity about us TTC Drivers,,,,,,,I still say thank you….BUT that might not last too much longer.

And I ask you this, can you now understand WHY, that might end…..

You as a rider play a big part in our emotional state. You as a rider play an integral role in how you get treated as well.

You expect us to thank you no matter how our day/night is going, how about you still thank us no matter how YOUR day/night is going or has gone.

More later but I would like to thank you all for reading this and maybe the few that “get it” will see things a bit differently.

And as an added. YES the TTC has slackers, just as YOUR job and any job out there has them, BUT don't paint us ALL with the same brush. It is unfair and makes for a difficult working situation.

Again more later......off to get ready for another thank less night....well maybe tonight will be better. One can HOPE.

Also added.

When you see me or another driver stopping at a Tim Hortons or Coffee Shop it is most likely we have to go to the Washroom. As you may have noticed there are NO toilets on TTC Busses and that is a GOOD THING I assure you. It also might be because we are ahead of schedule and stopping for a few minutes to get a coffee after a stressful 5 hours of sitting in a seat driving to ensure we DON'T zoom by YOUR stop 5 mintues early.

I and others of this profession are afforded a workplace that insures DIGNITY.

I will NOT annouce to a bus load of people, nor do I even have to tell my Supervisor that I have to go take a PISS.

THAT IS NOT DIGNIFIED!!!!!!

AND I ask you, how many of YOU have to tell your Boss or your customers when you are going to take a PISS?

Diana Out!